Settling In

I think i like where im at right now. Study-wise i mean. Taking up Business Studies, Economics and Law. Probably gonna major in law. But you know how i can change my mind in an instant. however my moms routing for me to do law. since we might be studying overseas she wants me to finish my a'levels here and move up. i think i can just move up straight away. wanna get out of this damn country. I don't see a future for me here. Just more pain and agony. There is just one reason to keep me down here. But if i had to chose within one important circumstance and another not so important i would probably chose the important one don't you think. I've already put myself out there a couple a times. And still dissapointed with the result. Sometimes i throw a fit because i show i don't want to do something. And people don't understand why i'm doing so except for the obvious reason which is maybe because im lazy. Well im sick of hearing all this when it wasn't even on me to begin with. Sometimes i just feel like causing such scrutinizing pain on whoever who deserves it that they wouldn't want to have anything to do with what matters in their lives. And even so that in creates a scar through them deep down inside that they won't forget who put it there.