Foolish Me

I'm so sorry darlin.
never realised that it hurt you so bad.
i was under the influence.
you know how he can charm girls.
i didn't know that it would hurt you so much.
i know i kept telling him that we shouldn't cause of you
and ya'll just broke up so atleast give it some time.
but no he couldn't effin wait.
just couldn't wait to use me.
i was convinced
that he atleast cared
but as you know it was all a lie.
never much liked me either
we were all his collections, his experiments
Dun worry dahlin
we shall all get bak at him
one day it'll all come crashing down.
just hope we're there to witness the fall.

(This is for you ser*)

love ya babe.

Stop!

I've got to stop. Keep having flashbacks. Can't stop thinking about it. Everything i look at reminds me of it. "Do you regret knowing me?" "No ofcourse not" .....BUT YES I DO REGRET! I regret meeting you. I regret falling for you. I regret for having anything to do with YOU!!!

Didn't Deserve

Aching.

Deep inside I was aching.

Thought i had him.
Had him to hold.

Had him to keep.
Had him to love.
In my mind, he was mine.
All mine.

Didnt' even think about his background.

Didn't think it would matter.

After all i had him.

Even if it was just for a little while.

But I wanted more.

More than he could offer.

He then had another.

In which his heart really desired but lost

Blinded was i for i couldn't see the desperation

In his eyes it was shown clearly.

But i chose to ignore it.

Now knowing that he was on the rebound.

My heart sank

Regreting the day we met.

The day it occured.

I let him take charge.

That bastard almost made me loose something precious.

He didn't deserve to be the first.

He didn't deserve to see anything.

To have anything.

To have me.

Confirmation Frenz...miss them soo much.

That damn Dream.

Night. Driving through this beautiful scene. Bright lights hit our faces from lamp posts. mom was sitting next to me. glanced through the window and was fascinated. huge buildings surrounded the road which went straight up through the middle. There was this one weird but beautiful looking, glass covered building. Light from inside shone through so brightly. I couldn't help but take photos. I suddenly caught one guy staring at me through the lens. Feeling uneasy i put the camera away. We then passed this weird spot where people just sat waiting for something. "It must be the bus-stop" i said aloud. " No the bus-stop is just infront of us" mom proclaimed. I looked front and saw this weird formation that was supposedly a bus stop. it was machine like. it looked like a ferres wheel but more oval shaped where the top and bottom were far apart from one another. But half of it was covered by this blue glass which was not see-through. People were strapped into their seats. As it kept rotating a person would appear at the top and at the bottom, one would dissapear into the blue glass. When the bus drove up, the 'bus-stop' would transfer all of them into the bus and return to it's position. I was stunned. In my mind i was wondering if this could be the happenings of the future. I thought that we were in some exotic place like phillipines or thailand. But mom said that we're in Europe, Boa? I've never even heard of such a place. Pretty sure it doesn't exist.
Suddenly out of no where warlords were chasing us and we had to get out of the country. Landing in an asian country, we rested for awhile. an old chinese man was following us. seemed to be our protector. again the warlords appeared with their swords running after us. the reason i dont know. but just kept running. somehow we were able to corner one of them. i have no idea how it came to that. mom questioned him but he didn't reply. the old man then cut off his arm. i looked away in disgust. running. again we were running. dad suddenly came out of no where and pulled me away. still running. he kept taking the wrong routes. "Your going the wrong way! they're gonna catch us!" I yelled out. but dad being a person who never listens took a wrong turn again. we were cornered. i warned him didn't i. This time the only way out was through a hall leading to a beach. ofcourse we took it. the waters were hitting hard against the sides of the buildings. It was rising...fast. i had to start swimming for my legs couldn't touch the ground any longer. i looked around in haste but no sign of dad. i was alone. swimming. trying to get to high grounds. wondering how deep the waters were i looked down. Many bodies lay below. no movement. probably dead. then i noticed- a little child, no more than a toddler. struggling in the water just below me. i swam down and grabbed him. with the child with me i swam to the tallest building and started climbing up. i looked down and saw many people following me. then saw another child who was finding it hard to climb. i left the toddler at the topmost part of the building and went down to get the other child. the waters soon reseeded. But news stated that there was going to be another hit. The governor(dont know how he came into my dream) said that since i saved two children, will reserve a spot for me where the waters won't hit. Giving myself a shock i said " It's ok, I want to save the children!". Alot of heads turned in astonishment.


The most weirdest, most beautiful, most disturbing dream i've ever had.

Boredom.

bored. nothin comes to mind. den keeps askin me to update. here's to you den! exams are over..woohoo..havent been going to school. though i should. this post sounds boring. so gonna delete it soon. oh and to those who realise their in my blog. sorry. couldn't help it. just gotta bang someone you know. so taking it out on someone else. Just wanna say i love my babes and dudes. ya'll may not know who im refering to but i still love ya'll. this blog's been kinda dead for about two months now so i'll just fill it with this crap. Gonna be sent to effin indian college-methodist!!! gotta find an alternetive otherwise im toast. oh yeah since nilu's going there too then i'll have company. we can bask in the indain-ness! join the indian club! yeah its all about indians right now. damn. but it'll all be worth it in the end. well if its not it better be. right now- study. study. study. sorry if this bores you den. hehe. its meant to. since you're probably the only one reading this damn thing.